by Jess (sorry)

Cat and Rich are once again out and I’m trying to fill their shoes to no avail. I’ll try to make up for it by including everyone’s favorite, NOT STARS. 

Third Star: Phil (WTP)

“Hot Phil”, as his team referred to him, scored a hat trick which in itself is impressive but against the Hookers with some of their fresh talent (and old talent – hi Danillo) makes it even more impressive. Also at least 2 of his goals were unassisted. Sorry to blow up your spot Phil but the people need to know who to watch out for.

Second Star: The Riots

The Riots held a 1-1 game against the top team in d4 (Sky Fighters) and were able to take it to and win it in LOLshootouts.

First Star: Craig (Biters)

You don’t get an ‘extraordinary feats in goaltending’ award named after you without your own extraordinary goaltending. Craig stood on his head against Fuzz and it helped his team hand them a nice fat L. The true game of the day.

HM: The Gremlins for bringing some old school spirit back to this league and bringing tequila shots to the courts

HM: Rachel Greene for playing her first game back from having a baby 3 months ago against The Demons (I don’t even want to play them as NOT a new mother).

HM: ~Me~ because I scored 2 goals in my game and if anyone is mad at me for writing about myself please don’t confront me because I don’t handle confrontation well and might cry.

HM: All of the brand new refs for the day (Ellie, Courtney, Akhil).

NOT STARS

Third Not Star: Jerome for a goal celebration that was less-than-inspiring. I thought you were a football fan? Do more!!!

Second Not Star: On the opposite end of the spectrum, Hicks for a goal celebration that I wish I never saw and would like to never see again (it was inspired by a scene from The Proposal). Do less!!!

First Not Star: ALEX EM AND TASH FOR JACKING OUR BRAND AND DESIGNING NEON PINK SHIRTS FOR MEGA TOUCH’S ‘ALTERNATE’ JERSEYS. You’ll be hearing from The Rainbows’ lawyers!!!!